This weekend I had a really difficult time putting my 21-month old son to bed. He just wasn't interested in going to sleep, despite the fact that it was WAY past his normal bedtime.

I tried all the usual tricks to get him to sleep but nothing was working. Instead, he simply lay in his crib talking up a storm and singing songs. For a while, I humored him by singing along and saying things like: "OK, one more song and then you have to go to sleep." But nothing seemed to be working. He was clearly tired, but he seemed no closer to actually going to sleep. After an hour and a half, I was getting very frustrated with the whole process.

I was also tired and after trying to get him to sleep for 75 minutes my nerves were frayed. I thought to myself: "Please stop singing and talking and just go to sleep!" As I thought about how frustrated I was getting, I had a moment of mindful clarity.

I realized that I'm so very lucky to have a healthy, happy child who knows that he is loved and cared for. I'm so lucky that at the end of the day all he wants to do is tell me things (only half of which I am able to understand) and sing songs to me.

Yes, I was tired. Yes, I was frustrated. But I realized that these are just states of mind that are dictated by focus. I was focusing on each of those 75 minutes and that was making me frustrated. Instead, I changed my focus to just how little time we actually have with our children. Instantly, my mood changed for the better!

When I was a child, my father used to say: "I used to be upset that I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet." It really is a matter of perspective. The trick I learned this weekend, is that you need to be mindful enough to know when to shift your perspective away from the temporary issue or situation that is causing you frustration and instead look at the larger context.

What are some things that are causing you frustration? Is it time for a shift in your perspective?

ENJOY NOW!

Do you realize that everyone, absolutely everyone on this planet, grumpy office workers, arguing children, fickle spouses, the "narrow minded", the extremists, all think they're doing their very best?

So, how do you get through to someone who thinks they're doing their very best?

How would someone get through to you?

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Copyright (c) 2003-2004, all rights reserved.
National Library of Canada ISSN 1708-0606

You may copy, forward or distribute Mindful Moment provided that this copyright notice and full information for contacting Patrick Mathieu are included.

Contact him at: http://www.mathieu.com or email patrick@mathieu.com.